Sets in the City

I'm off to the U.S. Open through Monday where I will be, among other things, scouting interesting stories to report here. I have had a crazy week so I am actually looking forward to sitting around for hours doing nothing. And ever since The Michael Vick Show went off the air, the sports news has been a little slow - because this should not make the news.

Happy Labor Day to everyone who has been working their . . . tails off - including me!

The Star of David Not Shining So Brightly

So you spend millions of dollars ($250 million over 5 years, to be exact) to bring this guy David Beckham to resurrect - or "surrect" if you ask me because resurrect implies that you were up to begin with - Major League Soccer ("MLS"). According to one website's poll, he's only second behind the Beatles as England's best export. Now, several of you may be familiar with Freddy Adu, but beyond that, I bet you can't name another player in the MLS (and Freddy's gone, too). And Pelé is pushing 70 years old, having retired long before MLS came into existence (1993, but 1996 was when league play began), so scratch him off your list as a soccer player you know.

But despite the fact that only five people have actually watched dear Becks play a game, the powers that be tried their best to create a story - the Beckham Invasion, soccer's savior, etc., - but nobody really cared. They even tried giving him crazy, media-hungry celebrity friends like Tom and Katie, who even went to watch him play his last game with Real Madrid.

And added in a little Will and Jada - and Oprah! - to welcome him to America.

Ok. You tell me. Have you seen him play a game yet? Was that a "No"?

And then, when he's finally about to make his debut, he injures his ankle before his first game here with the L.A. Galaxy.

Now, to make matters worse, he is really injured now with a sprained right knee that will likely keep him out for the next 6 weeks, and keep the L.A. Galaxy out of play-off contention. Though seeing as how the Galaxy dead last place with a record of 3-10-5, I'm not sure why we're talking playoffs. I hope there was some injury clause in that $250 million because, at this rate, I don't think you're getting your money's worth, MLS. But if there was no clause, which I can't imagine there was, Beckham is certainly getting his.

Welcome to the land of opportunity, Becks!

***Some of you may have noticed that I did not mention his wife, Posh Spice. Excuse me, Victoria Beckham. First, let me remind you that this is a sports blog. Second, I actually don't have anything to add to what's been written about the "star" of one of the most boring reality shows that I've ever seen on TV. I'll admit that the show was somewhat entertaining, because she is kind of funny and clueless at times, but she's not quite Hollywood-crazy. And that is a plus in my book!

Trouble the Dog - $12 million . . . Flesh and blood - $0

I won't even mention you know who's name here, but I thought some of you might find this interesting.

So Leona Helmsley, the "Queen of Mean," passed away recently. The reason I find this interesting is because in her will, she left $12 million to her dog, Trouble, and left nothing for two of her four grandkids - who got cut out "for reasons known to them." Ouch.

Her brother and her charitable trust will receive millions. The two other grandkids stand to receive $ 5 million - on the condition that they visit their grandfather's grave site once a year. Even the chauffeur got a hundred grand.

But Trouble the dog made out like a bandit. He got his $12 million, unconditionally. And this despite having bitten a maid before.

Maybe you know who would have been better off had it been humans rather than dogs.

Flushing Meadows, Here I Come!

I know I missed the first day of play at the U.S. Open and for that I should probably be a little ashamed. But the Mike Vick show was on, so I tuned into that instead. Luckily, the show will only be in re-runs until December 10th so I can get back to my regularly scheduled programs.

Which brings me back to tennis. This Friday, I will be heading to the U.S. Open tennis tournament in Flushing Meadows, NY. I will be leaving my tennis shirt, skirt, socks, tennis shoes, wristbands, tennis bags and tennis racquets at home because I don't need these to watch a tennis match, but apparently not everyone gets this memo (I think they include it with the tickets). I can see wearing one, or maybe even two of these, but I really wonder about the guy who, every year without fail, comes dressed in full gear, only to be told that he will be relegated to the status of "fan" and, no, Roger Federer will not be asking him to warm up before his match.

I haven't watched much tennis since the French Open, but I know I need to brush up on my Russian and Serbian. This is an annual Labor Day event for me, when I get to spend up to 18 hours at the National Tennis Center watching tennis. If this sounds boring to you, then you probably haven't partaken in the festivities. Chief among them for me, watching Marat Safin.


Man, he's a talented young fella. While he did manage to keep it together long enough to win two Grand Slam tournaments - the 2005 Australian Open and the 2000 U.S. Open - he's what I'd call a bit of a loose cannon.

Federer (aka "Cool Fed"), whom I and apparently others might call the most dominant athlete in any sport, tends to keep his emotions in check.



In contrast, my dear Safin wears his heart, valves and all, on his sleeve.


I just need him to last until I get to town.

As for the other johnny-not-gonna-make-it's competing for a chance to win the U.S. Open, I do believe Cool Fed has this one in the bag, so I'm just hoping to see him get a few good matches. While his domination of tennis is more than impressive, it kind of takes all the fun out of it when you know who's going to win. Just ask the ten people in America who have ever watched an entire Federer match.

On the women's side, I'm looking forward to seeing Maria Sharapova (get beaten) and to watching Venus and Serena Williams. I guess I'm not the only one. If you haven't seen them play in person, you have no idea how strong and powerful they really are. I lucked up on 2nd row seats to watch Serena play Amelie Mauresmo in last year's Open, and I have to say I was quite impressed - even though she eventually lost.

What I do not want to see is a Venus vs. Serena showdown. Try more like a "show is over." I can think of at least 100 things I'd rather do than watch the two of them play, and yes, watching paint dry (#98) and peel off (#99) is on that list. Their matches have to be among the most non-competitive outings I've ever seen. Their all-time head-to-head record is 7-7, probably because they take turns letting the other one win. At least we'll be spared a meeting in the final since they are on the same side of the women's draw (tennis speak for a bracket) this year. But when they aren't playing each other, I am a big fan of theirs, and they're popularity is certainly good for the game. You go, girls!

Lastly, I am embarrassed to admit that American Express does such a good job of promoting the U.S. Open that I was inspired to apply for a card just so I could get all the perks (including free pedicab rides across the "boardwalk" from the subway to the vicinity of the main entrance). And they gave me a lot of credit. And the card is pretty. But what they don't tell you is that about the only place where the American Express card is accepted is at the U.S. Open. D'oh!

Exclusive! Eyewitness Account from Vick's Courtroom Plea

Today, Mr. Michael Dwayne Vick finally entered his guilty plea. He also commented for the first time on his case. Someone said that he must have been reading my blog because he was saying all the things he needed to say if he ever wants to play in the NFL again. Watch the man apologize to the public and judge for yourself. My favorite part is at the end when all 900 reporters try to ask a question at the same time. Can't fault them for trying.

A good friend of mine in Richmond actually attended today's hearing in person. She said it so offhand, I thought she was joking. In the interest of protecting her anonymity, here is our redacted (and spellchecked) Google chat conversation about the Vick hearing:

Friend: i sat in on the plea hearing today
he looked so sad
me: you did?
Friend: i know it was crazy
me: i write about this on my blog
Friend: it was a typical plea hearing nothing exciting
he is set for sentencing on dec 10
me: ok, first off, that's not true
Friend: there were crowds lining the street though -- protesters and supporters
me: this is a spectacle
Friend: yeah but it was pretty much by the book in the court room
me: would you mind doing a short little paragraph
me: :-)
Friend: when he left the court people were chanting but we couldn't make out what they were saying
Friend: his mother, brother, girlfriend and other family members were there
the court was mostly filled with reports
reporters
i can say people were lined up as early as 7:20 when i got in to work today
me: how did he look?
Friend: hard to describe - first thing that comes to mind is that he looked like he gave up
sort of accepting the situation and making the best of it
at the end he did turn around and lay a comforting hand on the girlfriend who was crying -- sort of like it's ok
he also looked sort of ashamed
me: did he look near tears himself?
Friend: no
he looked like he was trying to put up a strong front but you could feel the disappointment and sadness - it was heavy
odd thing is that it seemed like no one in the court room cared but his family and one guy who came in his jersey -- don't know who he was but -- he walked by and told him to keep his head up
me: any teammates or friends around?
or people that looked like football players, etc
Friend: umm not that i could tell -- but the court room only allowed a limited number others watch on closed caption tv in an over flow room so there could have been
me: you were in the actual room or in the overflow room?
Friend: courtroom but gotta run talk to you later
me: ok
cool
thanks!
take care
Friend: everyone else was there to get the story

Orson Welles once said “We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.” So even though millions of people have watched him on TV, hundreds have played against him, three friends turned c0-conspirators have apparently run a dogfighting ring with him, today, Michael Vick is all alone.

As my friend noted, he will be sentenced on December 10 (the same day the Falcons play the New Orleans Saints - I knew the connection was more than passing), and then the fiasco begins again. This Washington Post columnist says that he should never play in the NFL again. I say, as I said before, that the NFL will never go that far, and Vick has helped his case and been as remorseful as they need him to be to make it acceptable to let him play again. (Exhibit A: Falcons' President/GM Rich McKay's and owner Arthur Blank's statements earlier today about Vick). I expect to see him return just in time for fantasy football in the 2009 season (Jemele Hill says 2010, but I'm more "optimistic.").

To Vick, I hope that you meant what you said in court today. I am rooting for you now, even when it may not be popular to do so, because I believe everyone deserves a second chance, and I think you deserve a chance to redeem yourself and your name. And rest assured that if you don't start surrounding yourself with better people, you will be right back here all over again.

Alone.

Fantasy Football 101 . . . by Laura Nicole

Coming up on my first full year of working in the The Office, instead of working, I am learning that people spend their late August-early September days figuring out who they want on their fantasy football team. Whoever came up with this concept is a genius, not only because it has created a vested interest for the average man in each and every stat in a football game, but I'm sure it has resulted in at least a billion dollar loss in productivity during the season. So thank you, Fantasy Football creator.



My friend Niki the Body Laura Nicole (NOT pictured above) is one of the biggest football fans I know, male or female. And, more importantly to the guys out there, she's hot. (I know. Too good to be true. Post a comment with your picture and we'll see if she's interested . . .)

She will be departing these United States in a few weeks to head to Ecuador for the next six months, but before she leaves, I begged her to do a Fantasy Football 101 piece for Pleats 'n Cleats. To my delight, and hopefully yours, she agreed. Having just selected LaDainian Tomlinson ("LT") as my first pick in my league's draft, her tips are definitely going to come in handy as I wait for 23 more picks to go by before I can pick again . . . who came up with this system?! This is my first year playing fantasy football, so if I sound bitter, it's because I am.

But, ahem, I digress.

Laura Nicole will *hopefully* be posting here from time to time while she's in Ecuador, either giving us her NFL take or sharing her South American sports dish with us (check out her adventures in Ecuador on her own blog). Her posts will be titled "Laura's Linc," a nod to the home of her favorite team - the Philadelphia Eagles. When she posts, I'm going to let her have the entire post to herself, so today's post will be the only intro you'll see from me.

I bet you won't find anything this good written by a guy! Enjoy!

_________________________

FANTASY FOOTBALL 101

by Laura Nicole

Luck never fails to level the fantasy league playing field. Some owners will experience good luck in the form of a 5^th round no name pick having a break out season (and yes this is luck no matter what the owner claims in terms of knowledge that player’s history) and some owners will experience bad luck in the form of their first round running back going down with an injury in game 3. Because of this, if you apply the following basic tenets to your fantasy football team, you have as much a chance of ending up in the money as anybody else.

1. It’s all about the draft kit cheat sheets. Nobody shows up to a fantasy draft without print outs of the top players by position. Do yourself a favor. Go to espn.com or yahoo sports or whatever sports site you like or whichever one you can find. Look for the Fantasy Sports link on the site. With some browsing, you will find draft kit cheat sheets that rank players by position. Print these out and draft according to the next best player available for the position you need to fill. While some owners may try to outwit these lists, they are an invaluable guide and you can’t go wrong by following the recommended picks. They become especially useful as the draft gets into the later rounds and no owners recognize any of the left over players.

2. Ok – you have the draft cheat sheets but you have no idea what positions to go for first. There are a couple variables to be considered here. Most leagues have point systems that make players who score the most the most valuable. In other words, first you want to draft positions that will score touchdowns. The other major variable is the number of high scoring players in this position that are available in the draft this season. Because of this, generally, the premier running backs go first. Running backs get a lot of yardage, they get the ball at the goal line, and there are usually only a handful of high scoring fantasy running backs. There are players like quarterback Peyton Manning that can shake up this formula. Some fantasy players prefer to grab him early as they see him as a sure thing season over season. I have been in leagues where he has gone first in recent seasons. But keep in mind, generally it’s the top running backs and top quarterbacks that go first. Then move on to wide receivers, which are valuable but also tend to be more plentiful. In standard leagues, you will also need to draft a tight end, a kicker and a defense. Here is the general order to keep in mind: RBs, QBs, WRs, TE, K, Defense.

Draft several of the first three positions before drafting the other positions. It’s more important to have depth in those positions than in the others because there isn’t much difference in value in who you draft in the latter three (whether you draft the top kicker or the 10^th kicker won’t make or break your fantasy season).

3. There are a couple of reasons to have depth at running back, quarterback and wide receiver; injuries and bye weeks. With these positions, it’s not easy to pick up a player who will provide enough points for a victory if your starter gets hurt or has a bye week. This means you need to plan ahead when you draft. Pay attention to your running backs’ backups and draft them if they are still available down the line. Don’t be afraid to draft the backup for someone else’s starter if yours are not available. Pre and post-draft it’s important to take note of who the backups are. It’s wise to draft them in the later rounds and to be ready to pick up un-drafted backups should they become starters or earn playing time mid-season. Quarterbacks are always under a lot of scrutiny and quarterback controversies are not unusual in the NFL these days. Many teams have obvious battles at quarterback, so be prepared to pick up a new starting quarterback in the event that someone gets benched.

Additionally, plan ahead for bye weeks when you draft. ESPN draft kit cheat sheets have the bye week of each player which is great. You don’t want your 2 or 3 starting wide receivers to all have the same bye week or that will be a very painful week of searching for un-drafted wide receivers who can score (there won’t be many). So keep that in mind for each position as you draft. It’s also a good reason not to draft too many players from the same team.

All this preparation for the draft will put you in a strong starting position, but don’t get lazy after draft day. Injuries, team changes and unforeseen performances (good and bad) will keep you on your toes every day throughout the season. Luck is definitely a factor in fantasy, but if you don’t keep up on NFL news consistently you won’t be able to make key changes to your team during the season that could make or break your season. Bookmark NFL.com and espn.com at the very least and check NFL news every day for news and injury updates. If you don’t have internet access during the day at work or at home you have a tough road ahead of you. On the weekends, be prepared to make last minute lineup changes because many times teams like to keep an injured player’s status under wraps so the opposing team can’t plan accordingly.

If this is your first fantasy season, enjoy! You will be surprised at how interested you become in every game each week (as opposed to just watching your team) and shocked at the devil inside of you that wouldn’t mind if another owner’s starter went down with an injury (not career-ending or anything!). Even if you don’t win, you’ll learn a lot, be able to talk a big game and you won’t need this article next year!

Jemele Hill . . . Miss Bojangles?

Whoever said being a writer or even a blogger was easy . . . well, I've never heard that, so hopefully that means no one is saying it. When you put your opinion in the public sphere, where it can never be erased, you are basically putting a sign on your back that says "Kick Me in the Buttlocks*." Because you're going to get abused.

Check out this blog called The Starting Five, a site that's quite well done as far as blogs or even websites go. It contains a post about a TV appearance today by ESPN Page 2 writer and sometime sports analyst Jemele Hill. For those of you who are not familiar with Hill, I think it's safe to say that she's the only African American, female sportswriter currently employed by a "major" sports outlet.

To my dismay, she does not have a Wikipedia page so I was forced to do more searching than I wanted to find out about her. According to a Michigan State University website, which indicates that Hill won a 2007 Outstanding Alumni Award, she graduated from Michigan State in 1997, receiving a BA in journalism. Apparently, she covered a variety of major sporting events while working in Detroit for several years with the the Detroit Free Press. Some of the other facts on this page (such as her age and the length of time she has been with ESPN - see here) seem off, but this part of her bio was interesting:

According to a recent study prompted by the Associated Press Sports Editors, she is the only African-American female sports columnist to be found at the 305 newspapers surveyed.

See, I knew it was safe to say.

Now, the site gives picture credit to the Orlando Sentinel, but doesn't mention that she was a sports columnist with Sentinel for two years prior to upgrading to ESPN. According to The Starting Five's previous interview with her, she went to ESPN because it afforded her the opportunity to write and do television. (As if anyone needs to explain why they went with ESPN!) Say what you want about her often controversial opinions (see her open letter to young black men - and her video response here - or this, or this blogger's dissatisfaction with her), but she's starting to show up everywhere. Although I don't always agree with her views, I can appreciate that she does not shy away from saying what's on her mind. And, she balances her more controversial pieces with stories like this.

Well, Starting Five didn't quite pin her to the mat, but it did take her to task for apparently stating during her appearance on Outside the Lines that racial bias is to be expected in the court system. The blog thoroughly analyzes the implications of her statement, concluding that Hill went further than she needed to go to make her point.

While I was intrigued by the analysis in the blog, the comments to the post came right at her neck, accusing her of everything from "selling out" to "bojangling."

I think I found my new tag line: "Pleats 'n Cleats - selling in since 2007."

* No this is not a typo. This is the actual response given by a client when asked "Sir, where were you shot?"

Movie review: Brian's Song

I'm not sure if I'm going to make a habit of writing on Sundays, but I just finished watching a movie called Brian's Song (the 1971 original, not the re-make from 2001). It received 4 stars on Comcast, stars Billy Dee Williams and James Caan, and it centered around football so I figured it had to be worth watching. The storyline centers around NFL Hall of Fame running back Gayle Sayers' (Williams) friendship with his Chicago Bears teammate, Brian Piccolo (Caan), and Sayers' support of Piccolo as he battles with terminal cancer. Once you get past the 1970's cinematography and acting (this was originally a made-for-TV movie that went to theaters), it is a pretty good movie. Some elements of their friendship might make the "manly men" feel a little uncomfortable, but their friendship is believable. More importantly, it contains a valuable message about the true meaning of teammate/friend that seems to be lacking in our society.

Another warning for the "manly men": this movie is infamous as a tearjerker for men and women alike (part of the reason I'm sure it received 4 stars), so I wouldn't watch it with anyone you don't want to see you cry!

It's fairly short, so if you have an hour and a half, check it out!

Forty's the New Twenty*

I REALLY wanted to give this post a different title, but I decided I'd be nice to Reggie - for once. Don't tell anyone I was nice to him, I have a reputation to uphold.

In the smartest move I've ever seen him make (except retiring the first time), 42 year old Reggie Miller decided against returning to the NBA, this time with the Boston Celtics, to try for that elusive first NBA Championship. Has anyone ever seen a return from retirement work? When Michael Jordan took a year away from the NBA to stink up baseball, he was still in his prime at the time, and he returned to win three more rings with the Bulls. But when he left and tried to return again, this time with the Washington Wizards, it became apparent to all (most importantly, him) that it was time to let it go. But it's Michael Jordan, so no harm, no foul. He's still the greatest.

But Reggie is not MJ. Whereas Jordan commanded respect on the court no matter who he was playing with, with Ray Allen, Kevin Garnett, and Paul Pierce already on the Celtics team, I don't see Reggie getting enough touches during a game to make a comeback with that team worth it. Plus, even though he says he was up to it physically, I think he may have forgotten what it's like to play 80+ games against kids almost 25 years younger than you. I know how I feel after I compete against kids ten years my junior for only two hours, and it's not good. Soreness for a week when before, you weren't sore at all. It's one thing to walk into school the next day limping, but when you limp into work, people start asking questions.

I came across this interesting article on ESPN of all of the former players who are attempting a comeback now. Writer Marc Stein thinks it's in part coincidence, in part a reflection of the lack of veteran leadership on most teams. Just for fun, I thought I'd give my opinion on the players considering a comeback:

Allan Houston - Well, it would sure give us something to look at. (Just kidding, hon!) But seriously, Allan left at a fairly young NBA-age due to injury, and he's only 36 now, so he might have a little left in the tank. In case you weren't aware, he was the highest paid player in the league after he retired, making $20 million. Maybe he feels he should play for that money he made when he wasn't playing. . . yeah, maybe not.

Charles Oakley - Oak, is this a joke?? Unless the team needs a security guard or a wingman for their rookies when they go to the club, at 44, I don't see him showing up on anybody's roster this year.

Shawn Kemp - Oh wow, another blast from the even-less-recent past. He's up and down with weight like Luther (Vandross), and he just can't seem to keep his nose clean. I hope he can get it together, but he might be too high of a risk to bring the veteran leadership teams are looking for.

Tony Massenburg- Who? I added his picture to help us all out. Apparently, he's vying for the record for the number of different teams played with at 13. I don't have anything else to say about either of these players. If somebody is willing to pay you, more power to you.

Keith Van Horn - I honestly didn't realize he had left. I'll put him in the "eh, why not?" category. He may not win you any championships, but he probably won't make you lose one either.

Antonio Davis - Good guy. Hard worker. I started off saying I was going to be nice, and I'm sticking with it. Just remember that whatever team gets him gets everyone that comes along with him, too.

Qyntel Woods - Again, who? Another pic, see if he rings a bell. He went from Community College straight to the NBA, so I'm going to assume he had some other off-court issues (yes, Wikipedia, I see you, but as I have indicated below, I can't trust you anymore). I do wish him all the best. But he's only 26 and he's playing overseas - if he counts as making a comeback, then I can name about 50 guys who are making one, too. I think he's only on here because, like Vick, he faced some trouble for dog fighting. But you didn't hear about that, did you?

Scottie Pippen - He's Reggie with multiple rings. Also 42. Michael's finally put it down, and so should you.

Toni Kukoc - Nowhere near as talented as Reggie, but otherwise, see above.

Nick Van Exel - He was a solid shooter in his hey day, but ultimately ended up a loser in the "pay cut for a ring" exchange. According to the article he's in no shape to play, so I don't even know why he's on this list.

Latrell Sprewell - I'm sure more than a few teams would welcome him back with open arms if he's willing to give it another go. He was always fun to watch and he was as intense as anyone on the floor. His Wikipedia page says that he built his career around "his athleticism, versatility, and combative manners." (Note to self: stop using Wiki as a factual source of info.) Spree has had his fair share of interesting events during his NBA career (check , but it looks like a return to the NBA may not be one of them. But since he recently had his yacht repossessed, he might actually be looking for work. I wonder if he gets royalties on the rims that bear his name.

Michael Jordan - Ha! He just put this in here to make sure you were still reading. You are, right? Couldn't stand you when you played, but I can still recognize you were pretty good, and decent for the game. Again, I have a reputation to uphold, so don't tell anyone I said this.



I know some of you need the money, others of you just like to compete, and yet others of you don't know what to do with yourself if you aren't on the court, but if you (1) are over 40, (2) are a headcase (Google yourself if you're not sure), (3) have already won a ring, and (4) weren't "the man" when you were playing, I would strongly advise you to stay home. Call me if you need some ideas on what you can do post-NBA.

But if none of those things apply to you, prospective un-retiree, then the NBA needs you! But more importantly, I need you! I know I wasn't watching much TV for the three years I was in law school, but I don't recognize more than 2 players on a team come playoff time. Do it for me.

*Thanks Long Beach

NFL means Not (Gone) For Long

In case you haven't heard, Mike Vick filed his written plea agreement today (for those of you with the time and the patience, or who just need to know everything, here is a copy of the actual plea). He pretty much admitted to everything with which he was charged, only in the vaguest way possible. After looking at it, I'd have to say his lawyers are worth every million that he paid them. He was careful not to admit to personally benefiting from any gambling on the dogfights, which would amount to giving the NFL the noose to officially hang him and his cleats (sorry, I couldn't help it) up forever.

Following his plea, both the NFL, led by Commissioner Roger Goodell, and the Atlanta Falcons, led by Arthur "I was betrayed" Blank, responded with their own open letters/statements. (Oh, Vick's estranged father also resurfaced with his own tales about Vick, but I'm not even linking to this one, so you'll have to Google it on your own.)

The bottom line of the events today is that Vick has been suspended indefinitely from the NFL.

Blank made the following statement following the plea and the commissioner's decision to suspend Vick:

“Today, Michael Vick admitted his guilt to very serious charges related to his earlier indictment. His admissions describe actions that are incomprehensible and unacceptable for a member of the National Football League and the Atlanta Falcons.”

“We respect and support the Commissioner’s decision today to place Michael Vick on an indefinite suspension. As with other actions he has taken this year, the Commissioner is making a strong statement that conduct which tarnishes the good reputation of the NFL will not be tolerated.”

“We hope that Michael will use this time, not only to further address his legal matters, but to take positive steps to improve his personal life.”

Did he really say "tarnishes the good reputation of the NFL"? Nothing better than a billionaire with a sense of humor in supposedly serious situations. They claim there is more coming next week, so that's all I have to say about this statement.

Moving right along. In his open letter to Vick, Goodell expressed his disappointment, stating that Vick lied to his team, and (more importantly) he lied to Goodell. Ultimately, he suspended Vick indefinitely without pay. Concerning Vick's possible reinstatement into the league, Goodell said:

I will review the status of your suspension following the conclusion of the legal proceedings. As part of that review, I will take into account a number of factors, including the resolution of any other charges that may be brought against you, whether in Surry County, Virginia, or other jurisdictions, your conduct going forward, the specifics of the sentence imposed by Judge Hudson and any related findings he might make, and the extent to which you are truthful and cooperative with law enforcement and league staff who are investigating these matters. I urge you to give these individuals your full cooperation.

Let's take a closer look at this. This letter is open, and Goodell knows it, so he had to be as stern as possible to appease the people calling for Vick's head in a doggie bag. But see that last part of the above quote where he tells Vick exactly what he has to do to return to the NFL? That was Goodell giving us the "wink wink" that we shouldn't lose hope because we will see Vick play in the NFL again. He could have just said that the suspension would be reviewed in a year or after he completes his sentence, or something along those lines, but instead, he decided to go into way too much detail. Because justice and atoning for your actions are one thing, but money rules the world. You might as well set your TiVo now for the most watched game in NFL history. Mark my words.

Broncos, Schmoncos. It's All About the "Creek"

Jack Elway, son of John Elway, the Super Bowl winning, likable former quarterback for the Denver Broncos, is going to have an interesting year. It turns out his famous pops will be his QB coach this upcoming season. Apparently the apple didn't fall far from the tree when it came to talent. This season can go one of two ways for young Jack: really fun or suck miserably.

I recall one time, among many, when my dad took an active interest in my sports. He took it upon himself to build an apparatus in the front yard for me to practice on at 6 in the morning. Now, I am not a morning person; never have been, not sure I ever will be. So that lasted about three days, and I think my mom got more use out of it than I did. We have since moved out of that house but that apparatus still lives on. At the same time, I was also receiving pages of barely legible legal pad scribbles which he slid under my door, detailing (and hyperbolizing) the status of my "game." Just recently, he has been telling a story about how he would take my TV out of my room if I lost, but it seems I'd remember if that ever happened (that goes for having my TV taken - and losing). If he had been my coach, too, I'm not sure we would be speaking today.

I don't know what kind of kid Jack is, but somehow, I think this could be way more cool to other kids than it will be for him.

Then again, how many people can say they were coached in high school by one of the best there ever was? Despite my comments above, I realize now that my dad was just teaching me the discipline and work ethic that enabled him to be successful at everything from Division I basketball to winning cases. He may not be John Elway, but in my eyes (and in his own eyes, if you know him), he was better. And let's be honest: if he didn't come to every match and write me a note afterward, I would have been looking for him to get his feedback. Hey, teenagers are complex people.

So the moral of the story is this: Just suck it up, Jack! Suck it up! It'll all be worth it when you get that Super Bowl ring . . . or pass the bar.

Vick Revisited

I think I had a bit of a change of heart today about the Mike Vick situation. After I thought about the fact that CNN ran several hours of live coverage of Paris Hilton being taken from her home for DUI charges, I was reminded of the ridiculousness of the media's and our own fascination with the misdeeds of celebrities, no matter who or what color they are. I won't even get into the whole Don Imus debacle. I think seeing people with money and fame suffer makes the miserable among us feel a little bit better about our own lives. We like a good rags to riches story, but we can't get enough of a fall from grace. Kind of sad isn't it?

Mike Vick, I really hope you can turn this around. To all the dogfighters, I think it's safe to say the federal government has their good eye* on you so you might want to find a new hobby.

*Thank you J to the E.


**UPDATE** DMX did not get the memo. Tell his people to start reading this blog!

When Did They Switch to Touchdowns?

(Let's see if these images last the whole day)

So of course I love sports, but I must admit that I am a fairly recent baseball fan - really, only since my team started doing well. Before we started winning, the only time I ever turned on a baseball game was when I wanted something to have on in the background while I took a nap. So I guess that makes me a fairweather fan. Literally. Because if it's raining, you better believe I will not be sitting in the stands rooting for anybody. But I digress.

Just a few hours ago, the Texas Rangers opened up a can of whoop a put a shellacking on the Baltimore Orioles, killing the Orioles' confidence for maybe the next season or two by beating them 30-3 in their own home. I had to check out the box score on this one. This game was actually rained out on Monday - good thing, too, no need to make Monday worse than it already is. The Orioles were actually up 3-0 through the first three innings. Apparently, some time between the 3rd and 4th inning, a collection of hollowed out, corked bats were delivered to Oriole Park, because the Rangers scored 5 runs in the 4th inning, 9 runs in the 6th inning, 10 runs in the 8th inning, and 6 runs in the 9th inning. (Good to see they got on the board in the 9th so it didn't look like they weren't trying in the odd innings.) That equals 30 runs in 4 innings. Ouch. I bet even D.C. heard the fans groan on that one.

You know how they say in the movies, "You better take a picture of this because this is the last time you're ever going to see this again"? Well, here is the picture of the last run the Orioles scored before the Rangers posed for this same picture 30 more times.

When my friend, a complete sports fanatic and baseball guru, was as shocked as I was that a team had scored 30 runs, I was actually pretty proud of myself, because that meant that I knew enough about baseball to know that 30 runs is a big deal.

How big of a deal is it, you ask? This is the ninth time that an MLB team has scored at least 30 runs, but the first time that a team has done so since 1897. No, that's not a typo. 110 years, Babe Ruth, Hank Aaron, Barry Bonds, all came and (minus Barry, for now) went and no other team has scored as many runs as the Rangers did today. I really feel for you, Baltimore, but I feel even worse for your pitchers (except this one lucky kid who managed to earn his first save of the year by pitching three scoreless innings). I hope someone is keeping an eye on them this evening. [insert crass groupie comment]. Perhaps the fact that this was a doubleheader and they only lost 9-7 in the second game helped a bit, but those weren't the same pitchers as the first game. Like I said, keep an eye on those guys.

ESPN's awesome stats team managed to pull together, in a matter of minutes, the highest scoring feats in the "Big 4" sports:

Sport	Total points	Team (vs. opponent, date)
MLB	30	Rangers (at Orioles, 8/22/07)
NFL	72	Redskins (vs. Giants, 11/27/1966)
NBA	186	Pistons (at Nuggets, 12/13/1983)
NHL	16	Canadiens (at Quebec, 3/30/1920)

First thing: What is hockey doing on this list?

Second, 72 points in a football games seems like a lot, but I'm not sure it compares to almost 200 points in a basketball game - by the Pistons against the Nuggets back in 1983. (Where was that offense against the Cavs?) I'd say this had something to do with the Western Conference's notoriously high scoring affairs, but I'm thinking this one had more to do with the Nuggets' decision to watch the game from the bench when they didn't have the ball. I would also blame it on the Rocky Mountain high altitude -- except the Nuggets were the home team, so maybe they were just Rocky Mountain high (it wasn't unusual to take a few drags during halftime back then). I did a little research because I thought this might be close to the year that the NBA adopted the 3-point shot. Sure enough, the league intro'd the 3-point line in 1980, so having the highest scoring game ever occur 3 years after they stole the idea from the ABA sounds about right.

Did anyone else notice that 3 of the 4 performances were by away teams? What's up with that? Have some pride, dagnabit!

R.I.P. Eddie Griffin

I have to catch up on my rest tonight, so this is going to be a short one. Think of it as a reward for getting through yesterday's post.

I was extremely saddened when I heard the news that former NBA player Eddie Griffin died in a car collision with a train last week. He last played with the Minnesota Timberwolves. Apparently his body was so badly burned (and he was driving without a license) that it took the coroner until today to identify him through his dental records. He was only 25.

For those of you who have never heard of Eddie Griffin, check out his Wikipedia page which gives all of the sordid details of his life and basketball career. Despite getting kicked out of high school and later kicked off the Seton Hall basketball team, he went 7th in the 2001 NBA draft to the New Jersey Nets, who immediately traded their draft rights to him to the Houston Rockets. He played a few solid seasons at Houston, but after some problems, they released him. He was then picked up by the Nets, but sat out the following season while he was in alcohol rehab. He then spent several seasons with the Timberwolves until he was released earlier this year.



Unfortunately, he received more attention for his off-court issues than he ever did for his basketball game. He had potential, and probably would have gone higher in the draft had his off-court life not interfered. It seems that he never really found his way in this world despite his apparent "success." If you read my post below, then you can probably guess how I feel about this situation. However, it appears that people really did try to help him, but in the end, it was not enough. It's just a tragedy that it had to end so soon and so suddenly.

I just hope that you are finally resting in peace, Eddie.

Who's the Boss?

Today's post is quite long, but I think this topic deserved more space than I've seen it given - which is none at all.

I saw the title of this article by CNN/SI writer Peter King earlier today, and I was not happy to say the least. No, I was pissed. Why? Well if you haven't ventured over there, here is a link to Peter King's latest offering as the Monday Morning QB, entitled "A Boss Betrayed?" When I first saw the title, it was under a picture of Mike Vick, so it didn't take long to figure out who had been betrayed (Falcons' owner Arthur Blank), and who had done the betraying (Vick). Accoriding to King, Blank deserves our sympathy because he "did everything for Vick and got kicked in the groin." I didn't have to read past that line to realize that I wasn't going to like the article, but, for the sake of the blog, I kept reading.

King discussed with Blank about what he would do if he were in Blank's position. King said he'd spend $500,000 on a CIA-level background check on the next would-be-Vick to make sure the team was protected from the possibility that its investment might be lost. To which Blank replied:

"I can tell you we're going to be more thorough in looking into players before we sign them, particularly before we commit a lot of money to them,'' Blank said. "With Michael, I guess looking back now, we should have been concerned about the time he spent away from our facility. When he went home to Virginia, it's like he disappeared. It seems clear now that Michael had a secret life we didn't know about.''

I'll come back to this.

Next, King suggests that Blank should encourage players to stay in Atlanta year-round so that they can in essence keep an eye on them. He adds that the:

Vick story has driven home a point to him that when players leave town, they're sometimes back in the surroundings that led to trouble before they became pros. It's almost for their own good, in many cases (and certainly, as it turns out, it would have been good in this case) that some players cut ties with their past.

I'll come back to this, too.

Then King concluded with this:

The only thing left is for the Falcons, sometime in the next few days, most likely, to forever cut their ties with Vick. "Will you cut Michael Vick whenever this plea deal happens?'' I asked.

"That is unanswerable right now,'' he said.

No, it's very answerable. I think we all know that.

One last point. After the game, I asked rookie coach Bobby Petrino about his philosophy in handling the Vick story with his team.

"When you have a crisis involving one of your players, and this certainly is a crisis, I believe you do three things,'' he said. "You mourn properly, you do something positive for someone deeply affected by the crisis -- someone like Mr. Blank -- then you get back to putting your energies into what was important before the crisis. That's what we've done.''

Nice point by Petrino. I have a feeling it's not much of a Band-Aid for the bloody gash Vick has inflicted, though.

Ok, now it's my turn. It's bad enough that the NFL uses these guys, never giving two sh a hoot about them or where they come from or what they do until something goes wrong, and then they throw them under the bus and sever all ties forever. Then the owners cry woe is me for having believed in this guy and done everything he could. "We should have known, we shouldn't have picked this guy . . . if we had known, we would have thrown him back into the situation he came from. "

Yeah, I'm not buying it. This is the #1 draft pick who had one of the (if not "the") best selling football jersey around the world, one of the most popular and marketable players in the NFL despite his inconsistent (admit it, Falcons fans) performance since he entered the league in 2001, who went from the projects in Newport News, VA (aka "Bad News") to a multi-millionaire in a relatively short period of time. The same guy who could throw a ball clear across a football field (was that real?) . . . and you want us to believe that you actually took an interest in mentoring him or seeking help for this guy when you knew he had some issues even from the very beginning? If you believe that, then why don't you join ex-FEMA director Mike Brown as he spearheads the effort to help the people in New Orleans recover from Hurricane Katrina (just went there and they are still just beginning to recover) ? What's that you say? He hasn't been seen or heard from, at all much less in New Orleans, since he botched the relief effort? Oh.

Plenty of people who are far less "important" than Vick (in the NFL'$ eye$) walk around here with issues and have problems adjusting to a different environment and no one says anything to them. Rather than anyone trying to ease his transition from Bad News to "Good News" (HA!), and actually caring about Mike Vick and [insert names of any other "disappointing" NFLers] we stick them in an environment in which they are destined to fail, throw "opportunity" at them, and then wonder why they can't get it together.

Ok, why can't they? For starters, it is highly likely that our player's - whom I'll call "Superstar" - friends and family are/were still living in Bad News when Superstar "made it out" of wherever he came from. You tell Superstar to associate with better friends now that he has money . . . but people are constantly trying to erode every dollar Superstar takes in, so he trusts the people he's known his whole life, not these new "friends" - as well he should, IMO. But his "boys" from home are seeing dollar signs just like the NFL sees. They may even be jealous of our Superstar, and as close as they may be to him, they resent that they didn't make it like he did. They don't feel bad when they exploit him because, well, that's what friends are for. He makes it, we all make it. Superstar probably had several bumps along the way to his professional career, but no one says anything because he's performing, and that's all we want him to do.

That is, until he makes "the big mistake." Superstar and his friends get into trouble. Had this trouble occurred when Superstar was not, well, Superstar, nobody outside of the neighborhood would have cared, and everyone involved would have probably gone to jail. But wait! Hold on! Superstar was involved in this trouble! Now why would he do that? He had so much money, so much opportunity - why would he do this to himself?

Well, the answer is that he had some help. I can tell you the exact moment the problem began. It started the first time someone looked the other way when he did something inappropriate because he was a "freakish" athlete with "freakish upside potential." Anyone who is judging Mike Vick and calling him anything but his name for ruining his opportunities is being shortsighted. It is just as important to be in a position to take advantage of that opportunity as it is to have it in the first place. Can Arthur Blank and any other coach, athletic director, etc. who encountered Mike Vick truly look himself (or herself, but this is football we're talking about) in the mirror and say that he tried to help that kid take advantage of the opportunity that he had in his grasp?

King's perspective infuriates me for its shortsightedness. Tracking a grown man during the off-season and encouraging him to stay in the city where he plays is not the solution. Neither is paying anyone $500,000 to do a background search on the next prospect? What happens when the search turns up that the prospect - gasp! - grew up in the 'hood? "Good thing we found that out beforehand!"

King's article is nothing but a shameless attempt to absolve Arthur Blank (the man with the money, as King reminds us) from any blame whatsoever in this Vick debacle. Blank even uses the old standby of "copping" to having flaws that aren't really considered flaws (i.e., loving someone too much). Give me a break. You cannot green-light everything your player does, admit that you had no clue what he did in the off-season (which, incidentally, is twice as long as the "on-season"), and then turn on him when it's seemingly safe to do so.

I'll close with this excerpt from this article I found when I was looking for images of Arthur Blank. The article is ironically entitled "The Most Respected CEO," but what I found even more ironic is this quote from Blank himself, after comments regarding how he wooed Warrick Dunn:

In an era of absentee owners and - worse - meddling egocentric tyrants like Al Davis of the Oakland Raiders and George Steinbrenner of the New York Yankees, Blank has become involved in a deeply personal way. "I really am interested in each one of these fellas," he says. "Personally and professionally, in their families and their kids and their interests and their foundations, and how we can help them with their life's work. I care for them. I suffer when they're injured. I wish our fans could be down on the field and see these guys. They go to the locker room and I see the blood, see the throwing up, see the pain. And what you see on the inside is worse. They've laid it on the line for themselves and for their teammates and for the city. It's not about money. They play with a tremendous amount of pride. It's a huge commitment they've made. I came in the day after our last game [a loss at Philadelphia in the playoffs] to say goodbye. I gave 'em each a hug and told them thank you for what you've done for this city; you've turned this community around, made them feel connected again; told 'em I wish there were four-and-a-half million people who could be in this room and give you a collective hug. It's all about caring."

I couldn't agree with you more, Mr. Blank. I would just appreciate it if you would actually practice what you preach.

Rover Has Feelings, Too: The Michael Vick Saga

Ok, I'm going to jump in the ring with my two cents on this whole Michael Vick affair. If you haven't heard by now . . . you live under a rock, and frankly, I'm not sure how you found my blog but haven't head about Michael Vick. So, I'm going to assume you know the deal.

It seems everyone has an opinion, and that PETA is leading the charge to slay this man in the court of public opinion before (and if) he ever sees the inside of a courtroom (except when he was arraigned). Now I won't go as far as this comment did on a recent ESPN article:

toniokareem (8/18/2007 at 2:15 PM)
Gsmond...they're dogs....Matter of fact...they were his dogs, he paid for them. He raised them, and they were in his back yard. I could see if he attacked other people's dogs.

Now, as I said, I'm not going to go as far as toniokareem. I think there is something wrong withthis picture. I thought it was wrong when I went on a camping trip in fifth grade and watched some boys play "baseball" with frogs and tree limbs.

But don't we also condone sport shooting and hunting, sport fishing? I don't see PETA trying to tie up fishermen with their own lines like they are doing to Vick. We don't even know if he ever actually participated in any of the abuse.

The bottom line, though, is that the current indictment against him comes with a maximum six-year penalty. If they add racketeering to the mix,as they are suspecting, then he's looking at a twenty-year maximum sentence for that offense alone.

This twenty years may or may not be added on top of the six years for the initial charges, depending on whether he would have to serve the terms consecutively or concurrently. Consecutively means that he'd be serving a maximum of 26 years; concurrently means that the sentence for racketeering would start running at the same time as the initial charges, so that he would be looking at a maximum of 20 years. If that doesn't make any sense, check this out.

But all that is just speculation. I read the entire indictment and it seems to me that they are going to need other people to connect Vick to the worst facts because the feds do not have an open and shut case against him personally.

If he chooses to plea, which he may given what he's up against, he's guaranteed to get less than maximum sentence (hence why it's called a plea "deal" because no one would enter one if they weren't getting something better than they thought they could get at trial).

There are some pretty heinous allegations out there, but I can't hang the man out to dry just yet without knowing the facts. Some things just smell a little funny: he didn't live there, did he really need the money, etc.

Plus, when:

(1) I bet PETA wasn't there when this musher was suspended from Iditarod* competitions for two years for allegedly beating his sled dogs during a race,

and (2) Prisoner Jonathan Lee "kick him while he's down" Riches© (yes, he has copyrighted his name) is suing Vick for $63 billion "backed by gold and silver" and delivered to the prison, claiming that, among other allegations, Vick "sold [his] dogs on Ebay, and used the proceeds to buy missles [sic.] from the Iran government," I start to wonder what this is really all about.

My question is this: If this were Peyton Manning, would this be as big of a deal?




*This mention does not make Iditarod a sport.

Race Car Driving is Not a Sport . . . yeah, I said it

So for my first official post, I thought I would give you a list of activities that I consider to be a sport. For a definition, I turned to the trusty Answer.com, which offered this among the many definitions:

"An activity involving physical exertion and skill that is governed by a set of rules or customs and often undertaken competitively."

Note the phrase "physical exertion." I know that some of you may disagree and that is fine. You may even go on Answers.com and see that the first definition says only "physical activity." Nevertheless, the following is my not-so-exhaustive list, in no particular order, of some activities that I consider to be sports:

Sports

1. Basketball
2. Jai alai
3. Baseball
4. Football
5. Tennis
6. Boxing
7. Soccer
8. Hockey (Yep, few cared when it was gone a year but it's still a sport)
9. Track & field
10. Golf* - ONLY thanks to Tiger Woo

* But as long as people like this are playing, too, it's always going to be fringe in my eyes.


Whether or not the above sports will appear on Pleats 'n Cleats (i.e., does anyone care who's the next Carl Lewis?) is another question, but suffice it to say they made the list. What did not make the list? These are activities that involve skill, but just because you get a winner and a loser doesn't make it a sport. They are:

NOT Sports

1. Race car driving (If something really eventful happens, I MAY mention it)
2. Bowling
3. Poker
4. Fishing
5. Iditarod (maybe for the dogs, not the people chillin' on those sleighs)
6. Hunting or shooting at anything, especially clay pigeons
7. Billiards
8. Bocce ball
9. Spelling bees
10. Eating competitions

I believe what all these non-sports have in common is that sweating - and therefore, physical exertion - is due to lighting, outside temperature and/or pressure/nervousness, and not in any way related to the activity itself. Let me know if you have any others to add to this list.

Someone has already taken me to task for race car driving, saying that NASCAR and that other league are popular. I said, "Well, so is the circus." Also not a sport.

Remember: Just because you see it on ESPN doesn't mean it's a sport!

Hey hey hey!

Hello world!! It's yours truly, Pleats 'n Cleats, coming to you live from . . . where I live! Let's just say sports are a major part of my city, and an industry that used to be major isn't so much anymore. If you're confused, don't worry. So am I.

So why am I here? I played sports through the college level and have been a huge sports fan ever since I won the 100yd dash in kindergarten (true story). I had been a fan of blogs, and every so often sports blogs, for the past few years . . .

Then the other day, I was sitting on the couch, drafting an amazing merger agreement, when I saw this blogger/writer chick on [insert sports network]. She's sitting on this show with two other male sports pundits, offering her often controversial opinion. I said to myself "How did she get that job?? I can do that!" Now, not that I want to be on [insert sports network] offering my opinion, but at least I can offer my own view to the world. So, as with all major life decisions, I polled all my Gmail and Blackberry contacts for a name and here we are.

What's this blog about? As the name (hopefully) implies, it's a blog about sports written from a female perspective. Not that the views will be "classically" female, whatever that means, but just that I'm a woman and that makes me different than 99.2% of the other sports bloggers out there. So far I have identified about 3 others out there, 2 of which are for specific teams. If you know of others, please let me know so I can link them!

While sports generally means to me what's happening on the court/field, as I'm sure you have noticed, athletes' legal troubles have been among the biggest sports stories of 2007. So, I may devote entire posts to giving you the real deal on the legal aspects of these fiascoes. I see so much crap inaccurate information in the media, including blogs, but recall that Jay-Z "didn't pass the bar but [he] know a little bit . . ." - trust me, there is a reason we suffer three and a half years to learn this mess.

But I digress. On to my first post! Enjoy, and please feel free to comment with your thoughts, complaints, and suggestions!

P.S. R.I.P. Fred "Rerun" Barry!