Tuesday Football Rundown

Time is money, so we're jumping right in:

1. This is hilarious. For people to suggest that he did this because he's betting on the games is even funnier. It seems there are better ways to alter the outcome than taking out the QB. I've watched it a few times and I just don't see how what the ref did can be seen as anything other than a ref losing his mind momentarily. Where's the fine??



2. Kellen Winslow may be coming out of his pocket for his mouth. Winslow is not happy about how the Cleveland Brown treated him following his three day hospitalization with a staph infection, a problem the Browns have been trying to sweep under the locker room floor. They should have known they were going to have an issue if this guy got it. He's a "freakin'" soldier, after all. Maybe now they'll try to figure out why it's happening instead of trying to hide it. Staph infections? Seriously, that's just gross . . . and Winslow's entirely too pretty for all that.

3. Let's call this one "more like 'sucking' Broncos." Monday Night Football featured a blowout courtesy of the New England Patriots, who whooped up on the Denver Broncos 41-7. Were the Pats looking to prove on the premier stage that they still got it even without their golden boy? I think so.

4. Adam "Pacman" Jones has entered alcohol rehab. I believe that means one of two things: a) he (or his people) reads the blog, and/or b) he's coming back to the NFL. "Both a) and b)" is also an acceptable answer.

5. Looks like we're going all football, all the time today. The morning-after death knell tolled again, and this time its victim is San Francisco 49ers coach Mike Nolan. Apparently, he wasn't going to be fired:

Earlier Monday, [49ers VP Jed York] had said Nolan's job was safe for the time being."What changed," he said later, "was there were numerous reports (that Nolan would be fired) that were a distraction."

That may be one of the weakest excuses I've ever heard for firing someone. So Nolan's job was safe until people started saying his job wasn't safe, at which point his job became not safe and was in fact in extreme danger. Nice.

6. Try to catch the ESPN commercial with Dwight Howard and Tracy McGrady (and some others you probably wouldn't know) featuring new additions to the team RV. If I can find it online, I will post it. Good stuff.

Yee-Ha!

Two of today's top stories came from the world of football - specifically, the Dallas Cowboys. Although there are a lot of topics worth running to (i.e., boxer Vitali Klitschko using his son's wet diapers to keep down hand-swelling, John Madden taking a seat, Eddy Curry taking a seat and busting an exercise ball, etc.), I decided to be a one-story-woman.

The first story is a toss up between Adam "Pacman" Jones getting suspended indefinitely by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell after not being disciplined by the Dallas Cowboys AND Roy Williams getting traded to the Dallas Cowboys, joining another Roy Williams. Either way it involves the Cowboys so I'll just pick one.



So it looks like Pacman may have used up his 9 lives with the NFL. How many guys keep getting this many chances to act right, though? This is a guy who, when the Dallas Cowboys got him in a trade from the Tennessee Titans, they included a clause to move up draft pick received by the Cowboys if he got suspended during this season. I completely disagree with the suggestion from the sports commentators that he somehow would deserve more of a chance, or would be worth the risk, if he were contributing more on the field this season. That's the thinking that got Pacman and his last two teams in trouble in the first place. If he's not learning right from wrong despite the number of chances he has been given then he just doesn't deserve anymore chances. Period.

The funny thing is that, normally, I'm not a fan of teams or leagues hanging a guy out to dry when they've tolerated his behavior all along the way, but that's not the situation that Pacman is in. He has been given chances - repeatedly - and he isn't making any progress. Maybe they're not getting him the right help (it sounds like he may have a drinking problem), but he has to do work on his part, too. The hardest thing for people who "care" (I use that term loosely) about people to realize is that some people just cannot be helped. All you can do is make the effort, but if you've done all you can and they don't respond, then you have to let them go. I don't want to say it's too late for him, nor can I say for sure that everyone has done all they can, but at the very, very least, he needs some time outside of the game to get his mind right before anyone gives him anymore chances. I know the Cowboys tried to keep him insulated and surrounded by good people, but it doesn't look like he changed on the inside. This reminds me of a fable my dad used to tell me:

A scorpion, being a very poor swimmer, asked a turtle to carry him on his back across a river. "Are you mad?" exclaimed the turtle. "You'll sting me while I'm swimming and I'll drown." "My dear turtle," laughed the scorpion, "if I were to sting you, you would drown and I would go down with you. Now where is the logic in that?" "You're right!" cried the turtle. "Hop on!" The scorpion climbed aboard and halfway across the river gave the turtle a mighty sting. As they both sank to the bottom, the turtle resignedly said: "Do you mind if I ask you something? You said there'd be no logic in your stinging me. Why did you do it?" "It has nothing to do with logic," the drowning scorpion sadly replied. "It's just my character."

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is Pacman Jones, in a nutshell. Yes, a person is certainly capable of changing, but if he doesn't go through a serious character metamorphosis, this is a lost cause. The next team who dares take a chance on him may last a little while without incident, but they're only playing with fire. There are too many other talented players out there who would be able to appreciate the shot Pacman's been given.

So to any team who insists on even considering bringing Pacman Jones to town (assuming Goodell allows him to come back), please do yourself (and your fans) and him a favor and make him go through counseling for at least a year without playing (and without any incidents of any kind) . . . or just let him go.


Enough of that. On to the Roy L. Williams trade (not to be confused with Roy E. Williams, who was already a member of the Cowboys). People said this was a bad move by the Lions and the Cowboys. (Even worse than that move by QB Dan Orlovsky when he got a safety for attempting to extend the end zone past it's legal limits, and then the Lions lost the game by exactly two points? Doubtful.) Again, I'm going to have to disagree. This is a GREAT move by the Lions, probably the best seen since the Barry Sanders days.

The Lions picked up a future 1st, 3rd, and 6th round pick in the 2009 draft and got rid of a guy who couldn't wait to go. I imagine Williams feels a little bit like that one hostage who gets released. Who wouldn't want to get out of that miserable muck? I bet even Matt Millen has been sleeping soundly since he got the boot.

Most importantly, though, this gives the Lions another chance to blow it all up and start over, which is exactly what they need to do. If I were the Lions GM, I'd totally gut the team. Everyone. Every last player, starting with the ones who have been there the longest. I don't want anyone there who remembers what it was like to lose so terribly so many times, at least not until they've spent some time knowing what it's like to win somewhere else. The human mind is too powerful to ignore the psychological effect of being in a losing locker room for so many seasons.

From the Cowboys perspective, Williams may have been a Pro Bowler once upon a time, but he's not putting up Pro Bowl numbers these days (in his defense, he played for the Lions, which needs no explanation). So it remains to be seen how he'll fit in with T.O., who is said to be "ecstatic" with the trade. The only way T.O. is ecstatic is if he gets to catch the ball more often. And if Williams can draw some of the heat away from T.O., that leaves the latter open to catch more passes. Now I get it . . .

Let's just hope Tony Romo comes back before the season gets too far away from them . . . speaking of which, I'm now questioning Romo's allegiance after hearing about college football player Trevor Wikre, who opted to cut his off to avoid season-ending surgery. This is high on my list of most disturbing things I've ever heard.

From Crappy to Happy . . . and Other NFL Fables

What a difference a game makes. It's funny how one big win on Monday Night Football can take a team from sucking underachiever to "contender in a matter of, oh, 60 playing minutes to be exact.

Before an hour ago, the Cleveland Browns were mush and their current starting QB, Derek Anderson, was looking at the door. Eager (and popular) beaver Brady Quinn has been breathing down his neck for about a year now, and he keeps looking cute and smiley (in a kid brother kind of way) on the sidelines, all the while knowing he's more popular than the guy who starts over him. As the MNF gang pointed out, Quinn is the only back up QB to have his own commercial . . . making Derek Anderson the only starting QB whose backup has one when he doesn't.

Now, Anderson looks like Tom Brady with his "precision" and "accurate" throws, and the Browns, who could have been 1-4 after tonight, now have to be taken seriously.

No, the Browns didn't win the Super Bowl, but they did beat the Super Bowl champs, who have been looking pretty good in their champions tour. I should say looked good because they looked pretty awful Monday night. Eli Manning throwing three times as many interceptions as he has had in four previous games? That'll do it. And that tackle . . . come on Eli, that was pitiful, at least make it look like you care. (I couldn't find a picture of it, but I'm still looking!) I guess that's better than that jump away from the pile that Tony Romo did.

Speaking of Romo, his little pinkie's crying wee wee wee all the way home. (Sidenote: Romo really is an unfortunate last name for a really good high school QB) He will be out for at least a month with a broken pinkie on his throwing hand sustained in the Dallas Cowboys' loss to the Arizona Cardinals. I guess this is the one position in the one sport where such an injury would really cause the player to take time off. Broken fingers, especially pinkies, look really gross if they aren't set properly. So for the sake of all of us who will be forced to watch that reality show he and Jessica Simpson will have, I hope it sets properly so we don't have to hear her calling it "yucky." We'll see if any similar Brady-type effects are felt with this loss. The Cowboys have looked shaky (and always manage to get shaken and stirred in the post-season) so I wouldn't call them anywhere near a lock for a Super Bowl, but this certainly changes things. Once again, I'm ecstatic that I was too late for fantasy football this year.

Richard Collier is reportedly out of the hospital. That's good news.

Adam Jones may have cost himself a whole lot more than pissed off hired help. Bad news. Very bad.

One last thing: Braylon Edwards is definitely a star, but why is he the only one they let speak? He's certainly nice to look at and "articulate," so I'm not complaining but I find it interesting they never really talk to anyone else on the team, not even the QB. And the media loves QBs. Does Derek Anderson have a bad stutter?

Ready to Run . . .

Hopefully things (i.e., life) will lighten up soon. As it was, it took me two nights to write this, and more stuff happened, but I've updated where necessary. So until that light day, here goes nothing:

1. #24 Kansas State (a.k.a. Michael Beasley) finally beat #2 ranked Kansas in college basketball on Wednesday night. Kansas had won 35 or their last 36 meetings, and K State hadn' won on Kansas' floor since 1983, before most of the players who played last night were even born. Since Michael Jackson's Thriller album debuted . . . If you were expecting an MJ joke to follow, keep loooking. MJ is the man! And so is Beasley. Get a good look at him now, folks, because he will be gone in a few months.

2. The MLB has ruffled some feathers by asking potential umpire hirees whether they belong to the KKK. Asking whether they beat their wives or have a drug problem are OK, but the KKK is somehow offensive. A simple "no" would suffice. Thou dost protest too much . . . And since I wrote this yesterday, Jesse Jackson, Jr. has spoken out against such "ill-contrived questions" being asked.

3. Miami dropped its 17th game in the last 18 they have played. This time to the (spin the wheel, it has stopped on . . .) the Orlando Magic. And to add insult to injury, Shaq didn't make the All-Star roster. He would have made it for a record 15 years (wow, I'm getting old, and so is he) but, alas, it was not to be. They might want to just scrap the season and start over next year. Maybe they can get Michael Beasley if they lose badly enough. That's not the position they need the most, but I don't see any other really talented big men coming up the ranks, so I say start building up a solid roster.

4. Pacman Jones is getting charged dropped left and right. After avoiding charges that he punched a woman in a night club, his latest escape is frommisdemeanor public intoxication and disorderly conduct charges in Tennessee. Just one more charge for whooping some guy's _____ in Georgia, and he's a shoo-in for reinstatement to the NFL. This Super Bowl Sunday will be his first major test of the new year. Study hard, Pacman.

5. 5'5", 133 lb. Earl Boykins is back in the NBA with the Charlotte Bobcats. This will be Boykins 7th year in the league after he opted out of a $3 million contract with the Milwaukee Bucks, where he put up solid numbers. Let me just say that anyone who can make it in the NBA at 5'5" for one day much less seven years has to be one of the most talented players in the game. Yao Ming is about two feet taller than him, and Shaq weighs about 200 more pounds than he does. "Impossible Is Nothing" personified.

Delete Pacman, Insert Moss

Just as one man is being cleared, another one goes on the hook.

Amazingly, the lawyer in the Pacman Jones warrant case related to an alleged punching at a Georgia strip club has decided to drop the charges. No details on why or what happened, but I don't know if this one passes the smell test. Hopefully this is the last we will hear of Adam (Pacman) Jones having run-ins with the law.

Instead, on Wednesday, a woman placed New England Patriots WR Randy Moss in the hotseat. A woman in Florida is claiming that she was battered by Moss in her home on January 6, and he allegedly refused to get her medical help. The woman sought and received a temporary restraining order (TRO) against Moss requiring him to stay at least 500 feet away from her.



Moss, as you can see above, was very vocal about his innocence. I don't say this often, but even without hearing her side, I would tend to believe him. No charges have yet been pressed. People are speculating that this was a scheme to get money from Moss. Who knows.

Once again, the truth will come out and if this woman is lying, this upsets me. Every false claim makes it that much harder for people who have serious situations to be taken seriously. If the TRO was granted, it's likely that Moss was at least with her or nearby her in some capacity, and while I sincerely hope that Moss is innocent, I also hope she had some basis for the TRO.

This Pacman Game Is Over

Pacman Jones obviously didn't learn his lesson from his last run-in at a strip club. Nearly a year ago, he was involved in a shooting at a strip club involving some of his entourage during the NBA All-Star weekend (which I attended, but somehow managed to avoid any issues).

Today, a woman is asking that he be arrested for punching her in a strip club. The woman, Wanda S. Jackson, is not just any woman, but an attorney at that, and the attorney working on Mr. Jones divorce case. I'm guessing that she works with his soon-to-be ex-wife?

But the worst part is that her arrest warrant application, filed in court in Fulton County, Georgia, says that he sucker punched her. Apparently Mr. Jones was upset because he believed that the club was involved in the disappearance of his money and jewelry, and according to Ms. Jackson:

I was sitting in the office and he lunged at me numerous times in an
effort to do grave bodily harm," Jackson wrote in the warrant application
filed Jan. 7. "Veronica Jones, an owner, went into the hall to deal with a
member of his entourage. I followed to gawk. He was in the hall, surprisingly reached over or around a security guard and sucker punched me in my left eye.

I'm not sure what "I followed to gawk" really means or why it is here. Or why she thought saying that would help her tell the story. In any event, we won't know until about a month whether the magistrate judge will issue the arrest warrant. If he is arrested and charged, then this could throw a wrench in the attempted murder case in which he received special perks (i.e., avoided doing time) by cooperating with the investigation.

I can't help but think that Pacman thinks his actions are without consequence. He has been arrested 6 times since 2005(!) and he doesn't show any signs of really changing, at this rate. We don't know all the facts here, but it seems that it will be easy to prove whether he did or didn't punch her.

I have a few suggestions for him:

1. Stay out of strip clubs and entertain at home, if you must.

2. If you are tempted to go out to a strip club, remember your criminal run-ins and how much money you lose by not playing in the NFL for an entire season.

If he did this, he can expect to not play some more this upcoming season. (NFL Commissioner Roger) Goodell don't like ugly.

$20 For Some Action? Even Pacman's Embarrassed

The Ohio State University's third-string QB Antonio Henton, a redshirt freshman, has been charged with soliciting sex from a female police officer . . . for the whopping price of $20. Adam "Pacman" Jones, the Tennessee Titans cornerback now infamous for "making it rain," must be disappointed. Well, I guess he's in college, so he gets a bit of a pass.

But just a bit. First off, why is any college guy paying women for sex?? Last time I checked, college women were giving it away for no money down. Especially if you're on the football team . . . the Ohio State football team . . . and you actually play in the games. Well, you did, because it looks like you won't make it to the game this weekend. Why, kid, why? You all know I usually show compassion for the hated on, but Ant (we're cool, I can call him that), give me something to work with, please! You're already competing for the starting QB spot and you're certainly not helping your own case.

If you are indeed guilty, I won't ask what you were thinking because if this happened, you weren't thinking much. We'll just call it a serious lapse in judgment, or a joke gone horribly wrong.

While I was looking for pictures of dear Antonio, I stumbled upon this article from AJC.com (in Atlanta), written by his mom after he won Athlete of the Year in Football in 2006. The line below the headline features the quote "You look like your dad, but you got my smile." She also calls him "the perfect son." And it includes this picture:


Woo, boy. Ant, I'm looking at this picture of your mom and I'm thinking that that same hand caressing your shoulder will hurt like a ________ when you get slapped upside the head with it. Something tells me moms doesn't take too much mess.

I also discovered that his teammates call him Steamin' Willie Beamen, Jamie Foxx's character in the movie Any Given Sunday. For those who didn't see it, Willie Beamen is a stereotypical version of, without naming names - De-cough!-ion - the most vain, talented QB you can imagine. My favorite Willie Beamen scene is his music video - "My name is Willie. (background: Willie Beeeeeamen!) I keep the ladies. . . " I'll stop there. Suffice it to say, this nickname will not help his case.

If he did do it, please coaches, friends, and family, don't just give him a slap on the wrist. Nothing worse than a man who's disrespectful AND cheap!