Just Running

So it turns out I really do need sleep. And today was one of the least exciting sports days that I can recall. That can only mean one thing:

1. Kobe Bryant is taking it like a man (what does that really mean?) and is deciding to forego pinkie surgery. Coincidentally, several people I know who've played basketball have really fmessed up pinkie fingers that they never got fixed. It may not look pretty, but as long as his pinkie can support the ball, he'll probably be OK. I always knew he was tough.

2. San Francisco 49ers QB Alex Smith looks like he's out for the year with a broken shoulder. (This was not supposed to be an injury report, I swear). And it looks like he's thrown his last pass for the 49ers - for good. He came in with high hopes, and ended up . . . injured. I recall a certain someone from my fantasy team (who may or may not read this blog) who had him on their team and ended up regretting it. It sounds like another case of a guy with an injury that needs time being forced to come back before he's ready. And unfortunately, the person who pays the worst price is always the athlete. Check out this article by Jemele Hill, where she virtually composes an open-letter to Shawne Merriman asking him to stop playing. (Turns out he didn't have a choice.) And as an added injury-bonus, DJ Gallo from Page 2 explains why Matt Cassel's better than Tom Brady. Funny stuff.

3. I caught the tail end of the L.A. Angels/N.Y. Yankees game on ESPN. The Angels clinched the AL West with the win, the first team to have a solid spot in October. I also caught the familiar champagne bath after the game. I thought about how it was funny to see a team celebrating like that just for making the playoffs, but I guess the season's so long and the playoffs only include a few teams so it's a bigger deal than in other sports. But who knows. Baseball has so many "traditions" that it's hard to keep track sometimes . . . I may have mentioned here that I used to turn on baseball games to take naps, and I actually fell asleep during the game tonight, but maybe it was just a Pavlov's dog reaction. I can fully admit I'm more ho-hum than usual because no team I care about has been in contention. This fight between Ivan "Pudge" Rodriguez and Torii Hunter did pique my interest. Just a bit. Actually, the fact that Derek Jeter passed Babe Ruth's Yankees record for most hits also interests me. As you saw a few days ago, I'm skeptical of any accolades received when the playing field fails to include everyone who could beat you. Congrats, Jeter.

4. Continuing the theme, allegedly, there's this like, really big college football game on Saturday featuring USC v. Ohio State - the #1 and #5 ranked teams in the country, respectively. I haven't been much of a college football fan but I think I may watch this one. That is, if I have energy after Camp Obama . . . if not, DVR will have to come through in the clutch. Have I mentioned how much I love DVR yet? Or how happy I am that I never gave Comcast my money for this service?

5. #3 and #4 above made me realize now that I need to expand my sports horizons so I have more to write in these run-downs (I rarely run out of material for the longer posts, I just run out of time!) Since football's primarily a Sunday event, there just isn't much action to keep my attention on the weekdays. . . until the NBA starts up. Jessica Simpson/Tony Romo stories just don't do it for me - although the "Yoko Romo" tag was amusing.

6. I know it's usually five, but just as I was about to wrap this up, I turned on vh1 to check out Luke's Parental Advisory. When I turned it on, I wasn't sure which "Luke" they were referring to (Luke Jensen got a reality show?) but then I saw that Uncle Luke aka Doo Doo Brown, former fearless leader of 2 Live Crew, has his own show. In the two minutes I saw, I caught the following: Luke and his fiancee, Kristin, appear to be getting married soon, so they are sitting with someone talking about potential videographers. The other guy tells Uncle Luke about a few and notes that one of them shoots "pornos." Luke, naturally, says he wants this guy. Why? Because he is "good at close ups" and "taking tight shots" (and as Luke later tells us, "You know he can get the money shot.") When Kristin protests, this other guy says he's siding with the bride on this one. She actually seems like a classy lady. Further proof that love really is blind.

So We Meet Again

The Los Angeles Lakers welcomed the Phoenix Suns to town on Wednesday night. Of course, this was not just any game. This was Shaquille O'Neal's debut with the Suns, and Shaq/Kobe Bryant head-to-head. Kobe got the best of him this night, as he has in their previous head-to-heads since they parted ways in L.A. Speaking of heads, Shaq went completely bare on the head and the face in his debut, perhaps symbolizing his fresh start.

It's funny that Shaq has bounced around and Kobe has stayed with the Lakers for almost 12 years. Man, I am getting old.

Kobe had 41 points and one NASTY dunk. Even Bill Walton had to admit he is looking like the MVP. Obviously, he is proving what I and others have said all along - there is no such thing as a fair trade for him. Pau Gasol is looking like a terrific fit, and might end up being one of the smartest trades made all season when it's all said and done.

Shaq threw in 15 points, 9 in the last quarter, 9 boards, and apparently even surprised himself with his stamina at the end of the game. Amare Stoudemire had 37 points and 15 rebounds(!), Steve Nash did his usual, and even Grant Hill threw in 17 points.

So don't count out this Suns team because this was their first game with a new team and they still only lost by six to a very solid Lakers team. Again, looks like it is going to be an exciting finish in the Western Conference. As for the East? We'll just have to wait and see . . .

MYSM: The Kobe and Tyra Performance

Look out for the midday rundown.

In the meantime, please enjoy this oldie but goodie of Kobe Bryant and Tyra Banks performing during All-Star weekend back in 2000. This blog discusses how this came to be and the plan for the debut album, K.O.B.E., that thankfully never debuted.

Right here, see, I was going to post just an excerpt of the lyrics, but upon further review (and because it's worth it, trust me), I'm going to give you the entire song. Don't say I never gave you anything.

[Tyra] Kobe, how many girls have said, "I love you?" Not like 'I love you Kobe!' like a fan But like, for real, like, baby, marry me I love you

[Kobe] You're sweet Once again (Once again) Flawless (Flawless) C'mon Right

Uh, uh huh Yo, yo, it's like this Uh, what I live for? Basketball, beats and broads From Italy to the US, yes, it's raw I'ma search for the one that make my wealth feel poor Who can ignore the spotlight life of Grandma My falldown is how I found the aura, so I searched in There's plenty of women with sex appeal when it's filled Can even complete the package, all I date is actresses Can play it safe with them, my money ain't bait But I must take risks to find a honey that's legit Whether she push a buck and a six, bumpin' some mad chips Out on her own, or live out of moms and pop's home Watch time, fashion, Adidas attire or Timbo's I don't know, yo, these women come and go Like the wind they blow, how do I know it's you for sure? When God talk to me, give me a signal But until then, all my ears hear, just let me flow C'mon

HOOK (2x)

[Tyra Banks] K-O-B-E, I L-O-V-E you I believe you are very fine If you give me one chance, I promise to love you And be with you forever more

[Kobe] Check this out though Real love last, now do you love me or my cash? My name, fame, drop top, Benz or the wooden dash? You know my stash, from Georgie cash Platinum, US express, no paper cash Spend it all now, or kiss to be rich cash Hash, stocks and bonds, laugh when they crash Are you the type that brag the jewels you flash The type-type with your ex-man and push his Jag The type that love no scrubs or pigeons and got mad The type that can't stand a women with her own cash You know, like lime, claim she ain't rat The type that get loud in public, refrain my hand from a slap No time for y'all, too busy for y'all Plenty of dimes turn me on and turn me off tryin' to show off Get lost, grow up, real women, roll up Let yourself go, if you feel this, let me know C'mon

HOOK [Tyra] [Kobe] K-O-B-E, I L-O-V-E you Bounce wit' me, bounce wit' me K-O-B-E, I L-O-V-E you Right, right, uh, uh, uh

[Kobe] Think ya eyein' me, all along, I'm eyein' you The hunter becomes the hunted, girl, I'm preying on you Beautiful, the feelings we share are mutual Passion that's telling me so for us is suitable Un-controllable desire flows through me When you say my name, such lust in your slang No time for games, the games I play, all the same Can't get witcha, when the door hitcha, when the Lord splitcha I figure, hour-glass figures could be dangerous Cuz if your time runs out, they frame you for your clout And having a past, well, I stereotype glass All dimes ain't money, ass, and feignin' for a brother's cash Slash fame, slash power, slash respect All the above, makes me a supreme threat to scrubs Love but do you want? One more 'gain, let me know The words flow, from the bottom of your soul C'mon

HOOK (till fade)

[Kobe] It's like that Right KB TB Flawless Like that, spit it out

Awesome.

If anyone has the rest of the songs that were supposed to be on this album, PLEASE let me know.

Happy Monday!

Wade Returns. Doesn't Really Matter

Completing the NBA trio, Wednesday night Dwyane Wade returned . . . and the Miami Heat still lost. This was probably not the return he was hoping for, but now it's official: even with his help, the Heat are scraping the bottom basement of the league.

BUT, because every cloud has a silver lining, the Heat's loss gave Kevin Durant the Seattle Supersonics his its first win as a pro of the season.

Good. We killed two potential "news" stories with one stone. One, the story of Wade's return. Two, Durant's first win.

Tomorrow, when I'm not working until 1 a.m., I hope to tackle story #3 that I wish would die out: the Boston Celtics are the . . . I can't even say it. They're a good team, but they are SO overhyped, you'd think they drafted Larry Bird out of Indiana State again.

I guess this is better than Kobe-watch. Although, I did hear a comment during the Lakers game that Kobe Bryant was rumored to be coming to the Detroit Pistons, but the deal died. The Pistons? Detroit? Chicago - I might see him there. It was good enough for Michael Jordan, it's good enough for him. But Detroit? If you don't think the city he plays for has as much to do with any potential trade as the team that plays there, you are sadly mistaken. Big markets mean big money. If he leaves L.A. for Detroit, Kobe would be playing the best basketball of his life, because at that point, you know he is really getting desperate for a ring sans Shaq, and he's serious.

But I digress, because that won't happen. What will happen is that if the Heat don't start improving with Wade on the floor (and Pat Riley threatening to put his arthritic hip in the game over his current players), this has to be the last year of Shaq and Wade.

Get your tickets, people. I see a lot of shake-ups if this season is a bust for some of the more star-studded teams.

Westside Story

I was excited to see that basketball returned tonight. I've missed Ernie, Chuck, and Kenny - and Cheryl (the TNT Inside the NBA team).

Tonight, we visit the land of the Western Conference, where temperatures are only exceeded by the scores in their games, and defense can't be found even on the back of a milk carton (unless you won the championship last year).

The first game up featured the San Antonio Spurs vs. the Portland Trailblazers. The Spurs received their rings (zzzzz) and this game was just "eh" in my book. Of course, it was intended to be the debut of Greg Oden, but alas, no Oden all season, so this was just the rather boring game that I expected it to be. Actually, with players like Lamarcus Aldridge, the Blazers look like they'll be a good team, and when Oden comes back next year, they could definitely be one to watch.

Then the second game. I almost went to bed, but I'm glad I stayed up. On the marquee: Los Angeles Lakers vs. Houston Rockets. Yes, Kobe Bryant's long awaited debut . . . and he got booed by the fans! Not a total surprise, but for a second I thought this was Philadelphia. I think Kobe has the distinction of being booed by his hometown (Philly) and by his home crowd (L.A.).

Just when it looked like the Lakers were out of it, Kobe (and friends) made a run, down by two with under 15 seconds to go. On the next play, Kobe passes it to Derek Fisher for two . . . it's good, and we're tied. The same boo-birds suddenly loved him again.

And then in an instant, the homecoming was spoiled At the other end, with 4.5 seconds left on the clock, former Naismith Player of the Year and Duke alum Shane Battier hit a three-pointer to put the Rockets up by 3. The silence was deafening. 2.5 seconds to go. The Lakers had one good play left, and Battier fouled Kobe, apparently right before the act of shooting, but they were still in the penalty. Kobe went to the line and made the first, purposely missed the second, came up with the ball, and had it knocked away as time expired. Of course he screamed and cursed that he was fouled, but the game ended nonetheless. Life did not, despite his ranting.

Kobe had 45 points, as usual, but it's apparent that he and this team are not going to be making a deep run in the playoffs. I still don't see him going anywhere in a trade, and I was happy to see Chuck and Magic (Johnson) agree with what I said about him earlier.

East coast is up tonight . . . which should mean more interesting games, if you ask me!

NBA Opening Day Today . . .

Kicking off opening day in the NBA is the west coast. The only game you probably care about is Kobe vs. the Houston Rockets. In 48 minutes, if you believe the hype, we'll get to see what he's really worth and if he's really staying or going . . .

Enough talk. Let the games begin!



P.S. Kobe, are you sure you're not trying to play for the Detroit Pistons with this get up? This can't be part of the NBA dress code.

I Will Not Participate in Kobe-Watch

If anyone is wondering why I haven't commented on the Kobe Bryant "is he or isn't he" trade charade, I have decided not to weigh in until something really does happen, if anything happens at all. Otherwise I will feel obliged to continue to report the every day, (non) newsworthy items that make it appear he is/is not going to leave the Los Angeles Lakers for greener pastures.

What team could afford him without decimating their team? And who would the Lakers get for him that would make their tickets NOT worth giving away this season? (Then they will wish they were affiliated with the L.A. Spark)

Thus, until Kobe makes a decision - since his contract is the only one in the entire NBA that contains a no-trade clause - I refuse to play this yo yo game. Like J.Lo. I don't feel like guessing if she's pregnant. Just let me know when she makes the announcement. (Which she did, and she is.)

Wake me up when it's Kobe's turn.

Impatient at the Cracker Barrel It Is

As an update to this previous post, in which I asked whether we had a case of felony burglary or simply impatience at the Cracker Barrel, that question has finally been answered.

Prosecutors came to their senses and dropped all charges against Tony Joiner, a safety for the University of Florida Gators football team, after the company declined to go forward with any charges against Joiner. As the prosecutors said, "without a victim, there is no crime." (Sound familiar, Kobe?) That means he can travel to the team's came against LSU today.

BUT his coach was not so forgiving. Head coach Urban Meyer stripped Joiner of his role as captain, stating that being out late on a Monday night is not the behavior that he expects out of a leader of the team. Coach Meyer said that he will travel to the game, but he is going to pay a "heavy price" for the next four weeks. This to me sounds like he's not going to play for perhaps the rest of the season, maybe until bowl game time.

Ah, well. Sounds like a pretty good kid to me. I think the coach is being harsh because of all the attention this has received, which is unfortunate. But at least he's not looking at doing a bid in the slammer. And hopefully, he still has a girlfriend!